KRaZy KiK AsS Ko0Ky KrEEpY KaL Of Ko0LNesS

Tuesday, July 29, 2003:

Hey been a while since i wrote in this. I just saw American Pie 2 wow that movie was good. Funny as hell. Well been like 2 months since i got out of high skool, 2 months into summer then college, fuk i miss my freinds, i miss all the bravo peeps shit was fun while it lasted. Well worken at my temp job i got fired (was construction) he said i was a good worker but he said he can get way cheaper labor (prolly some illegal immigrant mexican workers) why pay me min wage an hour when he can pay a mexican like 3 buks for a whole day. well thats life i really need a job i plan to move out and live with my friend julez on the beach, need cash to pay rent and to pay for classes. I dont know if i have matured but i know actually analyze my actions tho most of them still are foolish and based on young ambitious reasons but i do think ahead. Well all i have to say is i feel like shit always have i miss her my true love my fallen angel, meh maybe life will get better juss another day thinking about her i really cant get over it, i mean shit i try but juss aint gonna work. Met a chik i gave her a ride home she was beatiful she doesnt have a bf (YAY) and she gave me her digits but it isnt gonna work, i need to try and shape up maybe some fuken plastik surgeory or some shit. Well life trully is a burdon i mean its just so hard for some people, and so easy for other i had to be one of the people that do it the hard way, maybe something good lies for me ahead but i doubt it, i dont have high confidence in myself but its not so low wherei get to the point of contemplating suicide i have gotten passed that, maybe more along the lines of masochism, maybe its a weird demented complex of sadism that i have wanting of my own self punishing do i like to see myself in such anguish? fuk it i dont care life sux. Well i guess im of to do who knows what, oh yea roy your prolly locked up and behind bars but im with you bro, we all are hang in tight and beat the system i know you can. Well i wrote this so my Diety will come back and restore faith in me i doubt it shit im probably crazy doubt if any of this made sense to any of you, well laterz all.
Kal // 7/29/2003 01:20:00 AM

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