KRaZy KiK AsS Ko0Ky KrEEpY KaL Of Ko0LNesS

Saturday, December 28, 2002:

Hi all, well i juss got home from work, i had to work 3hrs of overtime cause some stupid fat lady blew up her oven and they needed another good man to help take it out and install a new one, apparently she lit the filter after leaving the gas on for some 3 hrs, tell me she aint a dumb bitch, well its not a matter for me to judge, well i havent eaten anything for 3 days now except for an apple which im eaten rite now lol, you know the sayen an apple a day keeps the doctor away well its pretty tru im feelin alot better, but i can feel the food as it goes down my esophagus and it hurts everytime I swollow lol. Well this break sux ass, ive done nothing so far, my freinds are off somewhere havin fun, well i need a vacation and im going to hawaii for 2 days then massachusets for another 2 days next week so imma have fun, a much needed vacation as i see it. Well umm i dunno what to write i usually never know what to rite i juss blab whatever comes to mind and nothin is comen to mind rite now, so ill c ya guys later.
Kal // 12/28/2002 03:50:00 PM

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Friday, December 27, 2002:

Hi its almost 1 i juss got home from work. I think something is wrong with me, I have no more feelings, i mean at work i dropped an 80lb airconditioning unit on my foot and i didnt feel it one bit, I was scared when that happened but in my break i cut 2 big X marks on my stomach with my favorite combat knife and i felt nothing not even the warmth of the blood as it gushed down, Im typen rite now and my fingures are juss barely able to type they are limp and numb and i cant feel anything, my neck cracks everytime i turn my head it feels like its gonna pop off, my back cracks everytime i sit up or sitdown or let alone move, when i look into the mirror i see a kal slouching and no matter how hard i try to stand straight i cant, and then i see my eyes they scare me they are colored red blood red and its juss so dense its like my eyes are bleeding, begging me to gouge them out. I also have no remorse or feelings either as beat the fuk out of the first rasict white boy i saw on the way home i usually let them mock me as i walk away, but today i bashed the poor guy head in practically, I have no family as my brother turned against me and my parents being the usual anti kal fukers. Im so lost i dunno what to do anymore. The lack of sleep and everyday depression as well as my starvation diet are finnaly getting to me. Should i go back to the days after my gf left me, the days of depression that were covered by booze, drugs, one nite stands and endless parties? I used to do it all, i tried to go clean because i found out they only covered the problems not solve them, but now i wish i can cover all my problems, but i want to be clean i dont like drugs anymore, but they are slowley pulling me back. I dunno im juss lost im gonna go wander the streets in search of the answer. good bye and have a nice day.
Kal // 12/27/2002 01:00:00 PM

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Thursday, December 26, 2002:

Hey guys, whats up? well today suked ass, nads, frog shit the worst things u can think of it suked it. Well the high light of the day i got off work only to come home to a bitching family, well i ignored them, went into my room played resident evil i tink im pretty far in the game, got bored of it halfway through so i started playen age of mythology got bored of that, started playen 007 nite fire, and i juss got bored of that. Well i have to work again today i start at 12 again, ive only has like 15 minutes of sleep. Well my dad is tryen to be my freind again being all nice to me even asked me to help him buy groceries so i go and help him (of course i have to hes my dad and i love him) he is like freaken 77 yrs old so i go help his old ass out and everytime he tried to start chattin with me in the car i blew him off, and i was speeding like a motherfuker to piss him off, was driving all fuked up to, well u guys think im mean for doing this but u dont really know whats happening. Well 2 of my freinds are turning against me jose the fuken bitch is all pissen me off, and isaac tellin me to apologize to them, IM LIKE APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT!!! i didnt do anything wrong, well he was there he saw me when i snapped, man did i snap on them or what. Well i cant be mad at my freinds they are my tru G's and they are juss looken out for me but i just wish they wouldnt tell me stupid shit like go apologize, fuk that. Well im a little closer to gettin kiked out of the house my mom and bro support it to the fullest, my dad is all thats keepen me in, i know he needs my ass, im the only one that talks to him cares about him, and know i look and see a lonely bastard dad, wit no one to talk to and i juss laugh even though it hurts me inside i laugh because for once im not gonna take there piddly shit im gonna stand no more fuken picken on kal for no apparent fuken reason. Wow sorry got carried away, i juss let my emotions run when i rite these gay blogs i dont like deleting what i wrote, well im hungry as hell i havent eaten anything today, and i wont best way to diet is starvation lets see im down to 178, was 256 u do that math see how many total i lost. Well imma try to get a couple hours of sleep knoked off before i goto work. Laterz all u people wit perfect lives.
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Kal // 12/26/2002 09:39:00 PM

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Wednesday, December 25, 2002:

Hey guys Merry X mas Y'all.....hehehhe. Well today was an okay day, well it was good day actually considering i got a whole mess of games from isaac I LOVE YA MAN. well im playen resident evil 3, and talken to sergy and typen this at the same time lol. Man its so scary (resident evil that is) i like it better than my old version because this one actually works lol. Well i got into this mad argument wit my parents, they are talken of throwen me out, and im all like go ahead i dont fuken need them, always hated this hell hole sorry excuse of house, Ill juss stay at julios house for a couple weeks till i can find my own crib, if worst comes to worst i can drop school and work full time, but hey i prolly wont get kiked out, my parents need me to much, they need someone to help em, god knows my bro is too fuken stupid to do it, plus they need someone to blame there problems on, something goes wrong blame kal thats the family motto. Well i have to goto work in an hour and a half i start at 12 today, guess ill go try to get me half an hour asleep before i leave, Yay another day of broken sinks, and mopping floors!!! :) its all good, its not as bad as i make it seem, well..... yes it is. Well im listening to christmas time by blink that song is cool. Well i have to stay happy, u know promote christmas spirit and world peace (im a pacifist ya know).....(well sorta)....(not really)... aight imma jam laterz all u lovely folk.
Kal // 12/25/2002 10:40:00 PM

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Tuesday, December 24, 2002:

hey guys, well i took my dad to the hospital he feels really sik he had to get an echo and cardio done because he is really sik, that took forever but it was worthwhile because he came out clean nothing is wrong wit his heart, that is a great relief, well i thought today was sunday it turned out to be tuesday, all this graveyard shift work, and lack of sleep has my internal clock all messed up. Well i did ditch work not sure what day i did, i went to julios house and i slept over after seeing lord of the rings 2 wit him his bro and isaac. yea movie was kik ass but another crappy ass ending, im like DAMMIT i wanna know what happened thats what i was thinkin as the movie ended lol. I was thinken if i want to be any charcter in the movie i would want to be the human ranger he is badass, mean stealth and coolness in fighting, and he has a freaken hot ass elf gf and hes also destined to be king or somethin like dat, but more in reality i would be more like the dwarf strong, ruthless, but clumsy fat and short and stuped, those are my perfect traits. Well i guess its been a good day, my dad is well. Im tired im also cold and my neck and back hurt from all the work, and i feel all fuked up, i have to goto work in 3 hrs thats gonna suk, hey if u guys wanna kik it over the break juss hit me up, aight ill c ya guys later
Kal // 12/24/2002 09:20:00 PM

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Sunday, December 22, 2002:

Hey guys, well i juss got home from my parents freinds house, it was a surprise party for an old couples silver wedding anniversary (50 yrs), we threw a surprise party, the couple were so happy, and i was in charge of taken care of all the little kiddies, i held a puppet show, and then we played some games, then i read all of them a bed time story and put them to sleep, and juss sat there wathcen sleep in peace, the hardest part of the job is waken them up so they can go home, its such a beutiful sight when a child is asleep its a shame to wake em up. Well im worken the graveyard shift again, this time i start at 2am instead of one like yesterday, ill prolly get of at 2pm, if im lucky ill leave at 10 or 11. Well imma try to get an hour of sleep tonite before i goto work, ill see all of you guys later.
Kal // 12/22/2002 12:50:00 AM

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